It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Ive already seen two fights and a clown urinating in the middle of the street. Hello Halloween 2014.
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Randomize
