I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
I've been crying in my room listening to Billy Joel for 2 hours. Thank God Four Loko was banned.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
Omg I should get on tinder just to get some edibles in town
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
Randomize
