I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
just thinking about him makes my vagina shudder.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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