Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(519): View more from Ontario

dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.

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(503): View more from Oregon

You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??

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(916): View more from California

let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.

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(828): View more from North Carolina

Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream

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(804): View more from Virginia

I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?

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(732): View more from New Jersey

it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?

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(941): View more from Florida

Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.

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(507): View more from Minnesota

So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...

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