what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
I just did the classiest thing ever.
last time you said that you got chlamydia.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
The Wii Fit is already telling me I'm an alcoholic.
A guy wearing a shirt that says "eat shit and die motherfucker" just held open a door for me. He's got manners.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
The dominatrix coworker is currently listening to pop music that has been translated into an Irish dialect and sung by high school kids. Every day gets weirder here.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
Any chance he has an open marriage? That penis shouldn’t be wasted on one woman. It should be shared with all womankind, or at least me. I’m too good at sex to be deprived a penis that large
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
