very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
Heard you were the one that shit off Jamie's balcony. FYI there is a cabbie down here out for blood
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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