THAT'LL be a good time.
and i don't know why my phone always capitalizes that word.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
but then the words kidney pain and possible testicle shrinkage kept ringing in my head
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
I think I sprained my soul last night
I've used my house key more to do bumps of coke than I've used it to get in my house.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
