I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
She tried to ditch the cab before she payed but she forgot to grab her shoes and wake me up
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Randomize
