I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I'm using process of elimination to determine which of our neighbors i fucked last night.
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I hate being near you and not being able to do what I want. It's like a recovering alcoholic tending bar. I feel like Sam Malone. Except I can't bang the cute chick I work with.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Look, if I'm too lazy to put any effort into sexting, you better believe I'm too lazy to put any effort into dating.
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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