o shit let me call u back theres a hamburger in my pocket
i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
They told me I stole 50 buns and a bottle of mayo and would whisper in their ears to look under my shirt to see what was for breakfast... benefit of starting to drink at 9 am
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
Do you rver get that feeling like their are poprocks filling ur boday?
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
My hookup from last weekend apparently got arrested today... his roommate just tagged me on facebook asking for bail money.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
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