history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
My adderall dealer raised his prices due to "impending inflation" ... never buying from a college grad again
I feel kind of like we’re in a gang and tonight is one of those “people are gonna know not to fuck with us” type of nights. And then tomorrow I am going to learn to pole dance. I’m not really sure how I got to this point in my life… but I like it.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
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