That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Is cereal technically a soup?
Fuck, I'm high.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Randomize