She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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