umm..so Dad's wearing a thong, I don't know what to do
put a dollar in it?
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
well as your friend its only fair to offer my cock for your services. Cause I care.
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
I feel like I spent all day wearing underpants made entirely of poison ivy and sandpaper
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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