windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
She's "threw gas on the fire to put it out" drunk. Come retrieve ur gf. Ps she smells like burnt hair
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
Somehow reaching for the flaming hot cheetos ended up in the best sex of my life
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