why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
The bride says you won't want any of the single ladies...
Let's let the open bar be the judge of that.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
Im going to be coked out with hello kitty fire arms. Valentines day can suck my dick
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
Randomize
