I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
You know who really doesn't like surpise in-your-face air guitar solos? Strangers.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I've never heard of anyone celebrating the holidays with a fuck buddies family before.
....I'll be expecting my trophy when I return.
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
trust me, you don't know shame until you're in a peacock costume getting CPR by random dudes
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Honestly, the only reason I've been productive today was because I ended up organizing my apartment while searching for my vibratory charger.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I’m turning 34 on Friday and I feel like the only thing I’ve accomplished in life so far is getting into pissing matches with clients
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