My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
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