I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
