4:33 am: Sleep on left side of my bed. T-shirts are second drawer on left side, boxers top right. I don't wake up when lights are on so feel free in my room..
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
he found my favorite bra, 3 thongs and a pair of jeans and gave them back. i love move out day.
He was all like, "I've prayed every single day just for one more night with you."
Omg just give him a quick handy and walk out.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
Come over. Bring cocaine. And my t shirt with the dolphin on it.
It was a blind-side dick pic.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You ruined the universe
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
