My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i think i have two assholes
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
I like how my family gatherings are basically an ugly sweater party just with better beer and wine...
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
He's in a nude suit, bald, with a pink headband and a black sharpie streak down his forehead.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
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