Just hit on a fat chick so shed buy me a drink. Then i walked away. Nice to see how the other half lives.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I think I left my camera at your house. It would be in both of our best interests if you don't go through the pics.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Jusy read on a science page that squeezing boobs can prevent cancer cells from forming in them, youre welcome.
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
The cat was building a spaceship out of the carpet, my legs were cans of tomato sauce, and there was something else in that pot you gave me.
I hear my roommate snoring and I feel bad for his girlfriend but then I hear them having sex and I guess it all works out in the end.
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
