he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
What am I legally allowed to do to a girl that is the equivalent of me punching her in the face?
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Plus I'm pretty sure you said "love you" on the phone, so technically I should be putting you on some type of probation
Thank you for not boning my boss.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
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