Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
sometimes i wonder what i would do without sheltered catholic girls w/ overprotective parents
never have sex?
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
it's like russian roulette but with a penis
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
The uber man and I sat in silence. With my underwear in my purse and my dress shoved in the pocket of the hoodie the guy gave me.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize