Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
