and you said cock pushups were impossible
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I woke up and watched my kitten suck on his nipple. Way too hungover to intervene. He thought it was me, so he just giggled and mumbled "mmm girl."
Seriously? God I hope he wasn't lactating.
......... Poor kitty
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I didn't just randomly come up with it. But if you want to give me extra credit for creativity I have a bare chest and chocolate sauce left
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
I am going to buy some m-80's and keep a bucket of them in the bathroom. That way I can just depth charge the toilet before each time I use it. Lets see how those snakes like cheap Chinese explosives
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Randomize
