I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
he wrote me a grocery list while i was passed out. every other item was gin. it went on for 4 pages.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She acted like falling "up" the stairs was a fucking physics phenomenon. I call that Tuesday nights.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
