sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
I just accidentally hit share on pornhub... Probably the scariest moment of my life
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Apparently I've texted the word shitfucked so much it auto-completes it now.
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
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