you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Randomize