you said youd get me home safely, you dropped me off at 9:30 last night and i just woke up on my porch.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
I'm sending you this that that when you wake up and see the girl sleeping next to you, you know who to thank
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Taking care of a girl who just peed on my floor so tonight is not a good night for sex
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
