Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
I was so drunk, he put me to bed and went down stairs to hang out with his friends. Apparently, I was curled up in the closet, spooning the dresser when he came back up.
Randomize