Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
She called him at 5 AM so that he'd be ready for her birthday breakfast and drinks at 6. This is why people don't need to wait until their 21st to have their first drink.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
UVE SEEN MY TITS OKAY STOP CRYING
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