I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I went to a party last night....I stole all of their ornaments and the toaster oven.
Randomize
