Just wanted to let you know that if you need my services as a male dancer for his birthday, let me kno so I can clear my schedule
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
you know it is a bad morning when you forget to brush your teeth and eat old gas x in your car because its minty...
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I always feel bad for the sober driver... Never been me but I feel bad... empathetic AF
I just drunkenly emailed my feminist dissertation as a resignation letter for my call center job. What am I doing with my life!?
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