Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
I just used celery as a chaser. That's the level of my refrigerator.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
There is a Victoria's Secret pageant on right now with Taylor Swift singing in lingerie. I didn't know a penis could get this erect.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
Randomize
