You picked a bad night to stay in. ____ caught her hair on fire in ____'s birthday cake.
She had to stop drop and roll while two other girls beat the flames out. She might have a black eye
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
There r osticjed everywhere
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
We found him flat on his back, sobbing, 'fuck you stars' at the sky. No more everclear for Derek.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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