too bad you live with your parents still
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
in hindsight, drinking 2 bottles of wine probably wasnt going to put me in an optimal position for a job interview
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
oh my god its dad's weekend for the sororities i can't wait to throw up in front of all these parents
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
You can have my vag. Its useless without you.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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