i called him pencil dick in front of over half of his fraternity brothers...
...never gotten so many high fives in my life! fuck ya i win!
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
Its only 9:11 and I just somersaulted through a window. Its gonna be a good night
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
did you see me getting spanked by that lady cop who was a guy?
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
And then you two got up and shouted in near perfect unison "I'M ALWAYS A SLUT FOR BASKIN ROBBINS" The bar just looked at us horrified.
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
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