Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
He calls it "his noble steed" and i plan to ride it.
I offered you a bag but you said "I gotta break in the new carpet" and you puked all over the floor
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I'm pretty sure that cute cop drove me home. Especially since I found his card in my purse.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
Randomize
