I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
he sent me the greatest dick pic I've ever received.
he actually took the time to cut a fingertip off of a glove then put it on his dick like a beanie. he called it hipster dick.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
You fucked him, didn’t you?
He showed up at my house with tacos, rum and a negative Covid test. Of course I fucked him. I’m just a simple girl that likes tacos, not Margaret Thatcher!
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