chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
IT IS NICKEL SHIT NIGHT
*shot. Why
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
