Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
After throwing up, the toothpaste tasted so good. Thank you for not letting me eat it.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Also I had a dream we made my birth control into a joint. What does that mean?
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
I'm still mad from all the stupid shit he's done this week that even though I couldn't give two shits about Vday, I'm gonna throw an epic tantrum if he doesn't morph in to Nickolas Sparks for a day
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
No I feel the same as usual. Mopey with a chance of bitch fits.
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