brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
in case you were wondering, even a BJ under a blanket on the back of a bus only lifts a 14-hour bus ride to borderline tolerable.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
I can't feel my tongue. And that means go. Green means go. And you know what Barney says. Green means go and woah means no. DRIIIIINKK
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
HE JUST ALLUDED TO FUCKING MY FRESH LOAF OF BREAD
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
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