He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
Just saw a homeless man taking a shower in someone's sprinkler system....
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
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