Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Is making out on a toilet while he is sitting down and pissing weird? cause that's what happened last night
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
dropping lines from Workaholics has slowly become my icebreaker when hitting on girls. who would have thought "lets get weird" would cause girls to actually get weird
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
I'm drinking on a Thursday because I can
Today is Wednesday you jobless drunk
Randomize
