We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Hey, what did you end up doing with those ski goggles?
Anything is possible. I didn't even know I was wearing the toilet cover as a hat
Trying to figure out the logistics of putting my laptop speakers on this plate with the last slice of pizza. Too drunk to move the plate. Not an option.
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
