Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
running late. just ran over a dude on a bike
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
Well, he sent me "techno kitty adventure" about 10 minutes ago. So, he could be anywhere.
We fed your dog hot wings then gave it some Bud light to drink. You're right. Dogs are fun.
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
I had 2 bags of iv saline fuilds for brunch and the buffet at the strip club for dinner. happy easter.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
I was playing 'If You Had To Fuck One or Die' with the old composite pictures with a guy in the bathroom line. They were all pretty ugly so I go "You can tell this is a lower tier frat"......turns out the guy was a brother
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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