Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
I'm getting the same feeling waiting for the web-page to load that has my final grades that I get when I take a pregnancy test. I think I'm gonna leave my computer for 3 minutes.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
I'm eating lunchables with a glass of wine while I FaceTime the guy I lost my virginity to.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
Randomize