After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
It was one of the greatest weekends of my life. And that's even after factoring in spraying myself in the face with the bidet.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
They don't even know who I am but they just woke me up with maracas and invited my boobs to a kegger
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Randomize
