I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
i'm traumatized. his orgasm face consisted of him looking like my dead grandfather and burping.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Yeah. I couldn't figure out why my toes hurt. Apparently, the guy I was dancing with, kept running them over with his wheelchair.
How ya feelin' champ?
Like a million bucks that was soaked in alcohol.
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
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