Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
You're a hot mess, you know that?
At least I'm a FUN hot mess. Like a train crash full of pizza, fireworks and glitter.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Do you remember trying to eat the shower curtain last night...?
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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